Bill Gates recently reflected on these last few years, remarking that his divorce from Melinda French Gates signified a personal low point. Well, we’ll be darned! Turns out even the wealthiest beings in the world can feel the dreaded lows just like the rest of us. And that should be no surprise to our EXaholics community.
Breakups, divorces, ghostings, all of these experiences have a profound effect on human emotions, no matter where you are on the socioeconomic ladder. As humans, our brains are wired to love and be loved, while our hearts fall right in line. You would have to be a robot not to feel it.
As we suffer the emotional hardships, we are expected to continue to move about in life. We are expected to work, cook, shop, parent, and be there for our friends. But that low we feel weighs us down while we make (often futile) attempts to continue living. And many of us crash. We hit a wall and can’t climb over it. It doesn’t feel normal. It feels intense, empty, nagging, painful, and stomach churning.
We’re also expected to get over it as if nothing happened. Society seems not so generous with giving us time to grieve and get through the overwhelming feelings. It often feels like our friends, co workers, and family are snapping their fingers right in front of our noses to make their point: make it snappy honey, no one wants to be weighed down by an EXaholic.
These low points are times of lower productivity, lower socializations, and lower vitality. That’s just hard to argue even if you do happen to know some people who buck the trend. Navigating through this morass can feel like the challenge of a lifetime.
You may not have Bill Gates’ money. But as you can see, money is no help in matters of the heart. Or in this case, really the affairs of the brain. The chemicals in our brains have a lot to do with how we feel. They are activated when we’re in love. And our bodies feel their absence when that love is taken from us. The complexities of how we get triggered make for a great investigative journey, if you can just muster the energy to learn about the process.
Our hearts and minds are vulnerable to love in both wonderful and also excruciating ways. If you’re going through that journey at the moment, you’re not alone. In that, may you find comfort.