I can’t think of a better way to put yourself in a worse spot in a relationship, than to shower your partner with praise and intense ego stroking. And guess what, that’s exactly what I did.
I told my ex that I was his biggest fan, that he was gorgeous, had an amazing body, was so intelligent, and I felt so beneath him as we walked together. I idolized him completely. This was the man of my dreams. I put him on a pedestal and I can’t stop obsessing about him.
He put me down, told me I needed to lose weight, said that I was too old for him that I must have been beautiful when I was younger. Can you imagine! By the way, we are only 4 years apart. But I guess he really believes in men aging well and women aging poorly.
I was simply so addicted to being with this creature and fantasized that he wanted to be with me all of the time. MY friends would tell me that he is a Narcissist and I refused to believe them. I can’t let go of the fantasy of us getting back together. It’s making my life unmanageable.
I would give anything to turn back the clock. I’d be the happiest girl in the world if he would ask me back in his life. But alas I took the crumbs he gave me and now suffer through unrequited love.